"On Children" from Kahlil Gibran's book, The Prophet

On Children

And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, Speak to us of Children.

And he said:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backwards nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.

-Kahlil Gibran

Spend some time outside this winter

Here in Oregon, the rain and grey have begun. And though you and your family may have started hunkering down for the winter, it could be time to start venturing outside. Now that the days are shorter and there are fewer hours of sunlight, our bodies are producing lower levels of serotonin, melatonin, and are getting less Vitamin D. Lower levels of these neurotransmitters, hormones, and vitamins contribute to the "winter blues." Thus, for the well-being of yourself and your kiddos, find creative ways to get yourselves outside for at least a half an hour a day. 

Consider walking to school instead of driving, going to the park instead of watching a movie. Have the kids come along on your daily dog walks, or spend some time climbing a tree. Find a field and twirl together in the rain, faces pointing upward toward the sky. Have fun and get creative! 

Loving Touch, Loving Movement

If you have seen the recent movie "Where the Wild Things Are," then you will be familiar with the term real pile. A real pile is created by a bunch a creatures (humans or otherwise) who have the need for touch, closeness, and expression of love. The creatures literally create a big snugly pile with their bodies, and in the case of the movie, fall asleep feeling both safe and held.

Creating a real pile at home with the kids might be a fun way of connecting everyone through safe touch. Instead of falling asleep this way, consider the real pile as a precursor to engaging in a loving, non-competitive form of wrestling-like play called Original Play. Original Play, discovered by O. Fred Donaldson, PhD, is a type of play that all of Earth's creatures engage in, including humans. It helps to strengthen connection and trust amongst participants, and alleviate aggression.

If you are interested in learning more about Original Play, I encourage you to explore Dr. Donaldson's website at http://www.originalplaynorthwest.org/ and watch the instructional videos.

If you are located in the Portland Metro area and like what you see on the website listed above, I encourage you to take your children to a "Play after Play" performance at The Brooklyn Bay. You can find more information at http://www.thebrooklynbay.org/ (please click on Children's Program).

Mindful Parenting Monday

Monday is often times the most stressful day of the week for parents and children. It's back to school, back to work, everyone is tired, cranky, and moving a little bit slower than you would like them to. 

So give yourself a break today... right now... and notice your breath. Breathe in and out... in and out. Notice where in your body you feel tense. Notice where you feel tired, cramped, etc. And take a few more breaths. Now imagine sending a flood of loving-kindness to the areas in your body that feel this constriction. Take a few more breaths, and notice how your bodily tension has shifted. 

I encourage you to practice this exercise again this evening... after you get home; during dinner preparation; and while the kids get ready for bed. Begin noticing how focusing on the breath and compassion during stressful times affects your interactions with those you love most. 

For more on mindfulness and mindful parenting visit www.themindfulparent.org